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What is Your Love Language?

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Are you familiar with Gary Chapman’s couple’s resource, “The Five Love Languages?” This book is a simple, yet powerful tool for learning how to better communicate with your partner through each other’s love languages. You can find more information on Chapman’s website:


http://www.5lovelanguages.com/



Chapman will educate you on the five main love languages he has uncovered; words of affirmation, acts of service, receiving gifts, quality time and physical touch. First, you and your partner will be directed to take an assessment to determine your primary love language. From there, you will want to read more on your partner’s love language, gain a better understanding of it, and learn helpful tips on how to fulfill their love language. Don’t be surprised if you and your partner do not share the same love language.


Words of Affirmation are validating words said to your partner to help them feel good and validated within the relationship. For example: “I appreciate you.” “You look great in that new dress!” “You always make such a great dinner.”


Acts of Service are meaningful things done for your partner. For example, emptying the dishwasher because it is their least favorite chore, hanging up your coat when you come home, or making the bed every morning. These may not be your most favorite things to do, but you are doing them for your partner so they feel loved.


Receiving Gifts, even small ones can go a long way to make your partner feel loved. For example, a handwritten card saying I love you tucked in her purse or flowers you picked up on your way home ‘just because’ are great gifts that will help your partner feel loved.


Physical Touch, reaching out and grabbing your partner’s hand or sneaking them an unexpected kiss. Physical touch may be important to your partner and being neglectful of this can lead to feelings of rejection or resentment.


Quality Time, is all about giving the other person your undivided attention. For some people, quality time is their primary love language and if you don’t give them quality time, they will not feel loved. For example, your partner values when you put aside 30 minutes after a long day to spend time with them or simply putting your cell phone down while you are together.



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